Chutney Challenged, Redux

“Thud, click. Groan. Slow zipping sound. Whispery crackling sounds. Squeal of wet sneakers leaving salt, snow sludge, mud on the hardwood floor. It’s time to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.”

That’s the sound of painful, slow progress – the sloughing off of bad habits to replace them with the good. Not new habits, mind you, just some of the boring, decent ones that I used to have: exercise, fitting into my clothes, writing stuff instead of just consuming whatever words are sitting right in front of me (Cam Jensen and Boxcar Kids, you’re plucky and all but you’re just not satisfying me.), not eating all forgotten, fossilized Halloween/Valentine candy and/or December holiday delicacies.

Change hurts. Even when grooves are well worn, cozy, as easy to slip into as a fleece-lined pair of Crocs (positive product placement!), it hurts when you slip out of them. It hurts more trying to slide back into them. Yet what choice do I have? For me and mine this will be a week of firsts: First day of daycare, first day back at work, first solo trip with baby, first time that baby found his hands, fourth time I have tried to figure out how to operate my damn 2012-edition Polar Fitness Monitor (eff you product placement!), first-of-the-month the house goes back up for sale. I’m not sure my current bad habits are going to get me through this time of transition.

 So that “thud” you heard before is my laptop hitting the desk. “Groan” is me accepting my fate begrudgingly. “Slow zipping sound” is one of the two pair of pants right now that fit me – kind of. “Whispery crackling sounds” is the discreet destruction of pretty much any candy-like object I’ve found in my house these last few weeks. “Wet sneakers” is what we’re not hearing on the hardwood floors anymore because this house is getting spit-shined and desalted and redecorated and back on the market. That last quote is some lady I used to hang out with. We need to reconnect.

Aforementioned baby, for the record, is not named Morrissey. He really did just discover the miracle of his two tiny baby-clam hands last night. Put them in his mouth and left them there for an hour. I can’t believe I ever forgot what it’s like to watch a baby discover her baby self, and I’ve seen it happen three times before. Maybe I’ll remember these things better now. Sloughing is good. So are the dark-chocolate mint M&Ms now on sale at Target.


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